Why do you fall in love the way you do? Why do some relationships feel like a rollercoaster while others feel like a warm blanket?
In the 1970s, psychologist John Lee developed the “Color Wheel Theory of Love.” He identified six distinct styles of loving. Finding your style is the key to understanding your relationship patterns.
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Understanding the 6 Styles
❤️ The Primary Colors
- Eros (Romance): Driven by physical attraction and intense chemistry. You believe in soulmates.
- Ludus (Conquest): Love is a game to be played. You avoid heavy commitment and enjoy the thrill of the chase.
- Storge (Friendship): Love grows slowly out of friendship. You value stability and shared interests over passion.
💜 The Secondary Colors
- Pragma (Practicality): Logic + Storge. You have a “shopping list” of requirements (job, age, values). You date with your head, not just your heart.
- Mania (Obsession): Eros + Ludus. Intense and emotionally volatile. You need constant reassurance and can get jealous easily.
- Agape (Selflessness): Eros + Storge. The purest form of love. You put your partner’s happiness above your own.
Note: Most people are a mix of two or more styles. Your style can also change depending on your partner and stage of life.